NOT an excuse

im going to new york. im going to sleep in a tent. im going to play guitar for old hippies. im going to learn to make dream catchers and weave blankets. im going to sell them to tourists. im going to eat meat because eventually i will go insane from the berries and snake meat will be the only thing to cure me. im going to grow lots of hair on my legs to protect me from bug bites. im not looking back. im mainly just excited about dream cathers.

i feel like i have lost a lot of what i cared about in life in a matter of a month. its a bit painful. i lost the best friend (i mean face it we knew that was going but..) so i lost the band. i lose a friend everyday it seems. i lost almost all the trust i could have ever been given from the one kid in town i wanted to keep more than anything. i mean obviously i lost it all because im an idiot. i get it.
a very very important friend of mine said the best thing to me in response to someone talking about my current situation (which really...i wish people would stop coming up to me and asking me about it. is this on perezhilton.com?honestly. ive gone lohan status sheesh). he said, "sometimes you have to love someone for who they are not what they do." simple words it made me feel alive still. it made me so very happy and lucky to have that kid around. so thank you,jacob castello. im still kickin and i plan on staying awesome forever. the kids in my world that love me even though im crazy and have done things they disagree with are the greatest people ever and i want to make each one of them a bundt cake with their name on it. everyone loves a cake with their name on it.