so long!

that was just my last egg white sandwich of the 08. that was the absolute worst one too.

party time tonight. this time i wont be crying in a bathroom.

2008 can suck it. happy new years eve!

i used to really want to be britney spears.

my brother is engaged.

christmas was good. i saw "the curious case of benjamin button". i always knew that i liked old men. i didn't know that i liked them a lot.

joshua loaded me up with lovin and fly gear and gave me my first pair of real diamond earrings. i never had real ones so my little heart was swooning! that man is good to me.

i miss sara and her kids.
yes.

sara and josh surprised me with ice skating.





merry christmas evessssss.

psssh

whatever.

estep

2008: In The Beginning
Where did you bring in the New Year?: sarahjane's
Who were you with?: sj,brian,joie,john,chris,jake,david...others?
Did you kiss anyone at midnight?: i guess.
Did you make any resolutions?: i usually try not to join cults.

2008: Your Love Life
Did you break up with anyone?: yes. 1 and a half humans.
Did you get anything for Valentine's day?: yes
Did you meet anyone special?: a couple really great people.
Did you fall in love?: yes.

2008: Friends and Enemies
Did you meet any new friends this year?:yesss
Did any of your friendships end?:yeah. who knew.
Did you dislike anyone?: totally.
Did you make any new enemies?: yes.
Did you resolve any fights?: yes i did.
Who was your closest friend?: sara has always been my constant.
Who did you grow apart from?: zippppped
Do you have any regrets when it comes to your friendships?: only the lara thing. i think. yeah. it ended it in a horrible way.

2008: Your BIRTHDAY!!!
Did you have a cake? yep. many different slices.
What did you do for your birthday?: on my actually birthday i was drinking a 40 with kelly and julia before going into doom gloom night at the wave hah.
Did you have a party?: yes. most wasted day of my life. that i can remember.
Did you get any presents?: yes.
If so what was the best thing you got?: reebox with the straps?

22008: All about YOU
Did you change at all this year?: oh yeah.
Did you dye your hair? i did.
Did you get your hair cut?: i got the worst trim of my hair growing career. ruined me!
Did you change your style?: hmmm.
Were you in school?: nope.
Did you get good grades?: n/a
Did you have a job?: yes.
Did you drive?: nope.
Did you own a car?: nope.
Did anyone close to you give birth?: people around me loooove making babies.
Did you move at all?: nah
Did you go on any vacations?: 07 was the year of travel for me. but joie and i hit up florida and i went to nyc, easton, and montreal. i dont remember anything else.
Did you leave the country at all?: canadaaaaaa
Would you change anything about yourself now?: at this point... c'est la vie.

2008: Wrap Up.
Is 2008 a good year?:it was rough. really really rough.
Did 2008 bring any new insights?: yeah. im not a raging lunatic of emotion anymore. i successfully ended my ties to chris braun and all the trouble it caused and i successfully was able to move on from john which was something i always failed at in the previous years and always said i could never do. coming out of all that madness im feeling great about myself and who i'm becoming.
Do you think 2009 will top 2008?: definitely. things are looking up!
If you could relive any moment which would you choose?: definitely wouldnt pick camping in new york where jake made me camp. maybe the lake house with josh and the boys and all that i learned over that weekend. i think im going to choose julia and i rolling around on sara's couch. i mean if i had to pick something then i say why not!

i got to ride my bike yesterday to the tunes of "detektivbyran". i was given the idea from melanie who said it was perfect bike riding music. so i bundled up in my peacoat and scarf and hopped on my cruiser with my lucky penny bouncing up and down in my basket to the swedish beats! i felt like i was flyyyyiinng down the street. i must share the video that melanie shared. it was a wonderful bike riding experience. hooray!

last night was a lot of fun.
im glad julia took my ass out.
and my ass is pretty huge.
it isn't raining yet so i'm going to ride my bike this morning.
still want to ice skate.

courtesy of john patrick

when do i wear capris? oh well. im just happy to be a part of the party.

josh has been working all month 12 hours a day 7 days a week. im afraid it will kill him before christmas. but the guy holds on and still finds time to make me feel so special. i love him.
i want to go ice skating. i hate ice skating.
i went to a doctor. im as healthy as a horse.
nothing else to report today.

nothing too exciting.

one thing i enjoy about where i live is that there are always people out and about all day and all night. it feels alive. im posting this because for the first time all season it finally felt like christmas. at least it did as i rode my bike home on tommy's side of the neighborhood. then i get to my street and its freakin compton. sheesh.

a better wolverine trailer

X-MEN ORIGINS: WOLVERINE HD


gambit!?

because we know i'm a nerd.

i'm sick of waiting for "watchmen" to come out.


i'm also waiting for "star trek". my mom has watched some sort of star trek almost everyday ever since i can remember.


and then of course theres the wolverine movie.


i'm pretty enthusiastic about my cinematic future.
the weather outside is far from frightful.
bike ride. yes.

annnnnd brandon and his girl are coming into town from tokyo this week! it was this time last year almost that i was in tokyo. drunken karaoke was one of my finer moments.

sup

i got my film developed from my diana camera finally. 3 months worth of photos.
i have no scanner but here are some of them.

seventy five degrees

i don't want to work today. i want to ride my bike in this warm weather.

i told everyone i didn't want anything for christmas at all but if i had to have something i'd really like this:

its an ipod speaker for my bike. the ipod speaker brian and i used over the summer worked like a champ but left little room for the 6 packs of beer everyone wanted to store in my basket. oh boy!

nothing cute about it.

guess who is going back to school???
its me.
i picked a major.
i win.
its about time right?

and this is how i feel about it all:



julia once called me her real life audrey hepburn. if only that were so. i wish i could get my degree in that.

flashback:

new york city has always been my favorite place for christmas but this year i really wish i could go to disney world for this light show. there's a carousel in the sky?!

under the influence

i love this guy

thanks joshua for the books, kisses, ray allen, and showing me you can sing the blues but you don't have to live them. we're awesome.

also, my puppies are awesome.

i watched half of "wall-e" last night. i don't knw why it took me so long to see that movie but it is the cutest flick in town! i want a wall-e bot. immediately.

i've had a big crush on jack kerouac over the past four months. im reading "the subterraneans" now. that is all.


more canada pics:

<3

canada was so much fun i wish i didn't have to come home. of course there are certain people in my heart in my world i would miss forever but i definitely had a blast and could see myself setting up permanent camp in montreal. i do need to learn french though. in the short time that we were there we did a lot. i loved exploring. i loved my french breakfast cafe every morning. i loved seeing all the places i saw as a kid and being able to share that with joshua. i loved my dad singing "volare" at the reunion and all the italians chanting and twirling their napkins in the air. i loved getting drunk and wandering home out of the metro station.

i didn't really love the racial profiling jerks at the border. i know they do their jobs but they were very offensive. i also didn't love the one million hour drive.

all in all a very great trip. i am very happy to have gotten away from the world for a bit and to be alive and very happy to have such a wonderful family.